Am I Willing?

I am writing this post while in a melancholy, retrospective mood.  Thus, I will begin with a disclaimer.
This post is in no way implicating, condemning, demeaning, criticizing, or meant in any way, shape, or form to cause anyone who happens to read the information contained in said post to feel any of the above emotions (or any others I failed to include).  I am writing this for my own retrospection so I will never forget what it truly means to be a friend.

 So now, let me share what I have learned about being a friend, especially during a crisis.

The past few years have been ones of walking through crisis for me.  I do not use the word crisis lightly, even though I do tend to be a bit dramatic at times.  When we are told in Galations 6:2 to "Bear one anothers burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.", the Greek word for burden has the meaning of "excess burdens, boulders, crisis, and tragedy."  People go through many different types of crisis during a life time.  If you happen to be one who has never been through a crisis, may you be building friendships for when that crisis does happen.   During and following a crisis period, many emotions ensue.  They run the gamut from anger, hurt, shock, pain (sometimes physical, sometimes emotional and mental), guilt, disbelief to hysterical crying and equally hysterical laughing, etc.  At the beginning of my crisis, I thought my heart was going to pound straight out of my chest.  I was sad and angry, I was hurt, I was shocked, I was hysterically crying, I was in disbelief, I was numb.  The numbness was heavy.  The numbness permeated every cell of my being.  My numbness was shared by a friend, and another, and another.

 Now, what makes this handful of friends true friends?  They were willing to get into the yuck of my crisis with me.  They were "God with skin on" to me.  They sat in the floor with me and we cried together, they held me as I cried, they called to check on me and when I couldn't talk through the tears they showed up at my house to make sure I was going to make it through that night, they gave up their personal time to stand beside me during the hardest and darkest hours, they listened as I asked questions they didn't have answers to and they didn't try to answer them, they made me eat when I didn't want to eat, they did everything they could to lighten the load for me.  They opened their home to me, they helped with my children, they brought me meals, they cleaned for me, they reassured me of the promises of Christ that I most needed,  but the most important thing they did was listen and walk through the yuck of the crisis. I knew and still know that any one of this handful of friends would be there in the blink of an eye for me.

Walking through someone else's yuck is not what I would describe as fun.  It causes you to open yourself up,  to be vulnerable, to most likely be out of your comfort zone, to not be able to fix the crisis.  I have been given the opportunity (yes, opportunity) to walk through different peoples yuck with them and sadly, I have failed some of them.  Some yuck is just too, well, yucky.  Maybe it brings to the surface things you would rather let lie dormant, maybe it isn't convenient (are there any crisis that are?), maybe it is too embarrassing, maybe it is too painful, too close to home, too real to get involved in.  Sometimes you become part of someones yuck by divine intervention.  Why did God put that handful of people in my life to walk through my yuck with me?  Why did God allow me to walk through so and so's yuck with them?  Whatever the reason, I am grateful for the experience of walking through someone else's yuck and for being the recipient of someone investing in me during my yuck.

When you walk through a crisis with someone, a bond is formed; a bond of knowing, a bond of pain, a bond of joy, a bond unlike any other that can develop on earth.   In one book I read during these past years, the people willing to go through the yuck of the writers crisis were referred to as "stretcher bearers".  I like to refer to the handful who were willing to go through my yuck as "God with skin on".  These friends were and are loyal, trustworthy, sincere, devoted, kind, patient, giving, loving, honest, available, encouraging.  They did not try to fix the crisis because honestly, some crisis in life only Christ can fix. They did not give me a Bible or quote Scripture to me and tell me to trust God more.  They did not betray my trust by sharing my crisis with others.  They did not demand I be "normal" but gave me room to grieve.  They protected me when I was in situations that were precariously dangerous.  They helped me fix my makeup when I fell apart in public.  They were patient when I couldn't seem to make it over the next hurdle.  They truly displayed Christ to me in many ways.

Some things that I have learned through being on the owners end of the yuck of a crisis are: some days are good and some days are not so good, a crisis doesn't just magically vanish and become fixed as quickly as it came to being, tears surprise you at the most inopportune times, grief is unpredictable, life doesn't stop because you are in a crisis, God's grace is sufficient!

I have learned some things NOT to do when walking through someones crisis with them: do NOT share their crisis as a prayer request, pretend everything is normal and walk around the monster in the room, tell them you noticed a change but thought they were upset with you, tell them you didn't want to bother them by asking how they were doing, give them good Christian answers or quote Romans 8:28 to them, try to fix their crisis by saying "if it were me I would ...", ask them why they can't just move on and forget about said crisis.

Being willing to walk through the yuck of a crisis with someone takes an investment in that person in many ways.  Am I willing to walk through the yuck with someone?  I hope I don't miss an opportunity to be "God with skin on" to someone.  I would never be on the back side of the yuck of my crisis without that special handful of friends who I am forever grateful to.  Thank you friends!

Lessons Learned

Anniversaries turn into years.
Years of pain.
Years of laughter.
Years of discovery.
Years of learning.
Years of growing.
Years.

Anniversary's are supposed to be joyous celebrations, yet my life contains some anniversary's that bring anxiety, heaviness, and gratefulness at God's goodness, grace, and blessings.  Those descriptions don't seem to go together, yet walking through this life has proven to be one of continual discovery at seeking the blessings in the dark spots; otherwise bitterness would ensue and Satan would win.

I have learned many lessons in these past years. Here are just a few of the more profound lessons I have been blessed to learn.
God has shown me that in my weakness, He truly is strong.
My shoulders are bigger than I thought they were, when I allow God to carry the load.
Fear and low self-esteem are my nemesis.
Anxiety and panic attacks are NOT fun to endure.
Friends, true friends, are not to be taken for granted.
Grief is exhausting and surprising at the same time.
Betrayal, regardless of the form it takes, is horrible to endure.
Christ is the only one who promises to never leave or forsake and He alone keeps His promises.
Satan is more powerful than we truly give him credit for, but Christ has won the victory in the end. Praise Him!
I have found that my faith is much deeper than I ever imagined and yet so lacking at the same time. Trust isn't easily regained.
All counselors are not alike.
Good teaching, taken out of balance, leads to becoming an enabler to someone else.  I wanted to do things so right, that I ended up doing them all wrong.  I allowed myself to get lost in what I thought was being a good, submissive person, friend, wife, mom, etc.  However, I had taken it to the umpteenth degree and enabled others to abuse me, disrespect me, dishonor me, devalue me. Boundaries are priceless.
The most important discovery is this:  My worth, my value, isn't found in a person, a job, an activity, a hobby, a title; my worth is found because of who I am because of Christ Jesus living inside me.
I can survive.
I am loved.
I am His!

Spur of the Moment Vegetable Soup

With cooler days upon us, and the business of football season, soups that I can throw together and leave in the crock-pot are my go to for our evening meals. 

 This soup is my absolute favorite vegetable soup in the world! 

 My dear mother-in-law used to make this quite often, and a simmering pot of this vegetable soup brings back many wonderful memories of her!  

She was an amazing cook!  Her family owned a restaurant, so she was princess of tasty home cooking (her mom was queen)!  Their diner was called "The Nifty" and was quite a hit in their small home town.  I cannot recall ever tasting anything she prepared that was not scrumptious!  I am so blessed to have learned many cooking tips from her!  This soup is the last meal she ever cooked.  My hubster and boys were blessed to enjoy the savory, satisfying lunch with her and my father-in-law. 

 I hope you enjoy this recipe and it becomes a go to for your family!

Sorry for the picture quality. Maybe you get the  gist of what it looks like.  We always eat  this soup with peanut butter sandwiches on whole wheat bread.  Very yummy!!!

Spur of the Moment Vegetable Soup

1 c diced carrots
3 stalks diced celery (use the leaves for an awesome flavor addition)
1 lg onion diced
3 potatoes- cubed
1 can peas with juice
1 can green beans
1 can diced tomatoes
1/4 c (+ or -) bacon grease
2 c beef broth
salt and pepper to taste

In a large pot, bring beef broth to a boil.  Add the carrots, celery, and onion.  Boil until tender.  Add remaining ingredients and simmer.  The longer you simmer, the tastier this soup becomes.
For the crock-pot, add all ingredients together.  Turn on low and simmer 4-6 hours.  You may have to add more beef broth, especially if you like more broth in your soup.

You can add alphabet pasta to this soup to add more texture and substance.  I also add corn if I have it on hand.  The sky is the limit!  This is a quick, healthy meal that is truly satisfying!

Enjoy!

Deliciousness

Do you love Pinterest?  I absolutely could waste hours exploring that site! 

Anyway, this week I found a picture of these delicious looking breakfast goodies.  I didn't bother to look at the recipe posted because really, how difficult can an omelet wrapped in bacon be?  

We tried these out, creating a recipe as we went.  They turned out wonderful!

Step 1: Wrap a slice of bacon in a muffin pan.  I used a stone (it is clean, just "seasoned") so there was no need to grease it.  If I were using a regular muffin pan, I would definitely grease it first.

Step two: Beat 8 eggs and 1/4 cup of milk in a bowl.  Add salt, pepper,  your choice of shredded cheese, minced onion, and anything else you enjoy in a normal omelet.

Step four:  Pour beaten eggs into bacon wrapped muffin pan.  Fill 2/3 full .  

Step 5: Bake at 400* for 20 minutes.  If using a regular muffin tin, decrease baking time by approximately 5 minutes.  Stones take a bit longer to bake. :)

Step 6: Remove from muffin tin immediately and serve.  This made one dozen  and only two of my boys  got to try them.  They had them eaten by the end of the day!  By the way, they re-warmed very well!

Happy cooking!  

Laundry Woes...sssssss

Ok, so I am trying to be thankful in everything, but I am having a bit of trouble with this one.

After a weekend away, hubster and I came home to find the timer on the washing machine had broken. Ok, no biggie, a bit inconvenient, but fixable. Hubster has spent the week looking for the best prices for a timer and last night hooked the broken timer back up so we can do a bit of laundry. We just set a timer to remind ourselves to go manually move the broken washer timer.

Today, after 2 days of doing no laundry, the boys and I get the laundry dumped and sorted and a load started. As I am waiting to turn the knob on the washer, I begin straightening the area around the washer and dryer. ( My "laundry room" is in our unfinished basement. )

As I was straightening the dryer, emptying the lint trap, etc. something above caught my eye. I like to call this a prompting from the Holy Spirit.

Look closely between the dryer vent and the cabinet.

And again extending over the top of the cabinet between the dryer vent and cabinet.

Yes, you are seeing correctly....it is a ginormous snake skin!!!

Anyone who knows me well knows that I am out of here! No more laundry for me and I am very close to sticking a for sale sign in my front yard! Snakes terrify me. I don't have just a small fear of snakes, I am deathly afraid of them, so it is surprising I am even able to post this blog!

My day was all planned to catch up the laundry, and straighten the basement in the process. Well, not so much now!

Hubster and Ashton will be snake hunting tonight. Hopefully they find the monster that is evilly lurking in the dark recesses of my basement, or possibly curled up in all the dirty laundry.

Anyone have a great home remedy for catching snakes? Or want to volunteer their time to come on the Great Snake Hunt of 2012?

Pray we find the snake quickly and are able to extinguish the evil that is lurking in the house!

Today I am choosing to be thankful that I don't have to do any laundry! :) God must have a greater assignment for me.

Abundant August

August in our home is exhausting, but full of an abundance of blessings! 

 We have three birthdays, yes three!!! 

 The hubster's is first, 

followed by Chance who turned 17 this year... 

  

tucked in the middle of the birthdays, is our anniversary

                            

followed by Bryce who turned 15 (today)!

Football practice has started which keeps the boys busy four nights a week!

I coach the cheer leaders which is a huge blessing to me!
They are an absolute joy to work with!
We are busy working our routine for pep rally!
May I just say this is a wonderful group of ladies!  Their parents have done an amazing job raising them to be respectful, polite, hard working young gals!  I love each one of them!

Choir has started back and I am preparing for school to begin after Labor Day.
And all of this in the midst of life as usual...you know, the normal cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc.
So between birthday pancakes and celebratory dinners, anniversary get a-ways, football and cheer practice, menus that utilize the crock pots, and every day living, August is abundantly exhausting: in a good way!

Life is good!  I am one blessed Momma! 

Gratefulness

Gratefulness-

adjective

1. Warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received; thankful.

2. expressing or actuated by gratitude

3. pleasing to the mind or senses; agreeable or welcome; refreshing

Gratefulness is expressing sincere appreciation to God and to others for the ways they have benefited my life. 

Today I am feeling that gratefulness needs to be my motto.  I awakened in the night with thoughts of gratefulness for different people and things in my life.  For me, it is very easy to see the many things to complain about, especially with an insanely busy week ahead.  Yet, I have a peace because of the many blessings in my life!

So....I am grateful today for

 being allowed a weekend away with my husband;

healthy, happy, children;

sunshine and cool breezes;

fresh fruit;

friends who are "God with skin on" to me-you know who you are :);

the ability to stay at home with my children while my hubby slaves away;

my garden;

books;

not having to mow the yard (due to the drought which I am not thankful for but there is still a blessing in it);

friends, friends, friends;

music;

ice water;

Ok, this list could go on and on.  I know a lot of the things I listed seem trivial, yet I feel these are the things often taken for granted.  

"In everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." 1 Thes 5:18

This is a verse that God is continually teaching and working out in me.  It is very easy to give thanks when life is looking rosy, but not so much when you are on the down side of the mountaintop.  In everything...  This is my goal and a continual work in progress.  

Today....I choose gratefulness.